Durante una estadía en Beijing, de noche en una habitación de un lujoso hotel, hallé una curiosa cajetilla en el baño. Su exterior avisaba que contenía un instrumento para amplificar el placer sexual. La abrí y estudié las piezas de su interior: una liga, una batería minúscula, una serie de cables.
Era difícil entender su uso. Desdoblé su página de instrucciones. El anverso estaba escrito en chino. Creí primero que el reverso era inglés; una lectura exhaustiva me permitió deducir que en realidad era chinglish, que es un idioma híbrido semejante al spanglish, si bien sus orígenes son otros y asimismo sus funciones.
Por temor, no probé el instrumento. De lo que no me privé es de una carcajada.
Copio aquí las instrucciones en chinglish. Sé que requieren elucidación pero soy incapaz de proveerla. Resta decir que no he alterado ni un espacio en blanco, ni tampoco una iota.
Function:
The goods will touch women sensitive areas, women can stimulate the clitoris, increase female sexual pleasure. Yam-depth, so that women can also partner in the clones can achieve orgasm.
Special features:
1. 40minutes, Can let user contain abundant time to make the usage of more varieties.
2. Extension that this product for male contains special features to make love time.
3. This product set top empress, can according to make love what posture adjust revolve the angle, and absolutely have intention to surprisingly Result.
Usage elucidation:
1. Fondle, can draw apart first top put the, and lightly press female ear, back, inside, outside Department etc, sensitive at take, and can let female attain the first high tide.
2. Quit the penis the absolute being to the root the department above, lightly the move or static motionless, can let the female While there is different pleasant sensation, and quickly sprinting, can up and down resolve this product 180 degree, avoid directly Oppress the underneath, and outside and can stimulate thesensitive district of the private parts underneath, and can have intention to surprisingly many Heavy results.
3. Female DIY hour, can by oneself massage the whole body sensitive the district, mimicry men can women to make love the piston to take the action The hour, finger hoots the ferrule, can the top and bottom, or so etc, direction is slowly the take, let female to quickly attain High tide.
• This product draw aparts to put the empress, and slightly make to flutter, and can let the battery and motor get in touch with, increase the motive move smoothly.
• This product after the usage if there is electricity to measure to can draw apart to put back to put the to continue to use.
• For the keeping this product of personal clean suggestion use a time.
